Two steps back...

It was a breeze of the wind that came over me

And with a chill down my spine, goosebumps appeared.

I knew what I was doing but I just couldn't breathe.

It was only 10 more steps and then...I would be free.

It was a chain reaction to one thing I had done

or perhaps one thing I could not let go.

I find myself in predicaments that could destroy my character

I have been called a lot of things, but self-destructive has always set true.

Let's break this down...

I carry myself with pride

Self-esteem pouring out 

My confidence held high

but my mind wonders about.

I trash my spirit wondering

why others always leave

Depending on another 

Wondering why I can't breathe. 

To ease the pain and slow the tears

I grab the glass half full 

It isn't what you think..

It's half full of vodka, ready to go.

I put myself in situations

where I just lose control.

Living in the moment

isn't always the way to go.

Take two steps back for every step forward

That's how it always seems to be.

They say love big and dream bigger

But the dreams never become reality. 

It was the breeze in the wind that came over me

like a bulldozer tearing down a building.

A chain reaction to something I had tried to let go;

I knew what I was doing but I went with the flow...

~~grb